A group of Alabama friends went deer hunting and paired off in
twos for the day. That night, one of the hunters returned alone,
staggering under the weight of an eight-point buck. "Where's
Henry?" the others asked. "Henry had a stroke of some kind. He's a
couple of miles back up the trail," the successful hunter replied.
"You left Henry laying out there and carried the deer back?" they
screamed. "A tough call," nodded the hunter. "But I figured
nobody's gonna steal Henry!"
The owner of a golf course in Georgia was confused about paying an
invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical
help. He called her into his office and said, "You graduated
from the University of Georgia and I need some help. If I
were to give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?"
The secretary thought a moment, and then replied, "Everything but my
A senior at LSU was overheard saying ... "When the end of
the world comes, I hope to be in Louisiana ." When asked
why, he replied, "I'd rather be in Louisiana because everything
happens in Louisiana 20 years later than in the rest of the
The young man from Mississippi came running into the store and
said to his buddy, "Bubba, somebody just stole your pickup truck
from the parking lot!" Bubba asked, "Did you see who it was?"
The young man answered, "I couldn't tell, but I got the license
A man in North Carolina had a flat tire, pulled off on the side of
the road, and proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of
the car and one behind it. Then he got back in the car to wait.
A passerby studied the scene as he drove by and was so curious he
turned around and went back. He asked the fellow what the problem
was. The man replied, "I have a flat tire." The passerby asked,
"But what's with the flowers?" The man responded, "When you
break down they tell you to put flares in the front and flares
in the back. I never did understand it neither."
A Tennessee State trooper pulled over a pickup on I-65.
The trooper asked, "Got any ID?" The driver said, "Bout whut?"
The Sheriff pulled up next to the guy unloading garbage out of
his pick-up into the ditch. "Why are you dumping garbage in the
ditch? Don't you see that sign right over your head," he asked.
"Yep", the man replied. "That's why I'm dumpin it here, cause it
says: 'Fine For Dumping Garbage'."
You can say what you want about the South, But you never hear of
anyone retiring and moving North!